Why Black Boys Don't Write

If I got a penny for every time someone was shocked by the fact that I am a man that loves to write/read, I would be renting out my house in Calabasas and spending my evenings in Dubai. No, but, I get it all the time, readers. Just the other day, my friend was telling me how surprised and in awe she still was by the fact that I love to write (she was actually the one that sparked the idea for this post so shout out to Grace-Ann). See, boys generally don't like to read or write, but for black boys its especially the case. I think there are many reasons why it is the way it is and none of them have to do with sex. It's all derivative of how we've connoted reading, writing and boys and how we as a society disassociate the two.

I, myself, am a black man so this topic hits pretty close to home. I've seen how other black men respond to reading and writing and it's sort of crippling to watch. Especially when I consider that our ability to read and write was something we had to die for, a weapon we used to protect ourselves with, and a primary way in which we retook our freedom. But, this isn't that type of blog post so, I digress. As a young Caribbean male writer, I find it imperative to explore this issue and it's why I think it deserves to be the first post to start off this #BlackHistoryMonth special. So, let's get into it.

Welcome to #BlackHistoryMonth with Matthew

For the entire month of February all my blog posts will be centered on celebrating my brothers and sisters. From giving writing advice about how to write black characters to showcasing some amazing black content creators changing the game right now, I'll be pushing out fully black content all month long. Not to mention, for this limited time I'll be uploading twice a week instead of once. So, you need to get in on this. Subscribe below to never miss an update!

Disclaimer: I am Jamaican so many of the topics and examples that I use might be particularly relevant to Caribbean societies and perhaps not as relevant to others.

The Way We Socialize Our Black Boys

A huge part of the issue has to do with how we socialize our black boys as children. So, let's uproot the issue from there. The moment black boys are born we expect things from them. We expect them to be extroverted, we expect them to be leaders, we expect them to be very hands-on and we expect them to be boisterous, if even a little. When we expect these things from boys, subconsciously the way we instruct and speak to them will reflect it, hence we already start to mold them into a box at a young age. So for example, your son is three years old and you buy him a football even though he probably knows nothing about the sport. What does that say about how we look at boys and what does that indrectly tell them? You buy the boy the ball because boys like to be outside and get messy, right? But do they really or are you, like everything else (teachers, cartoons etc.), teaching them that they should like it by indirectly buying them things, like a football. It sounds a little crazy but not if you remember that children really don't know anything. Everything they say and do is a reproduction of what they see and learn.

This subject of expectations goes especially for black families. I think most black families still hold some generally traditional beliefs really close so our parents construct these ‘boxes’ a little squarer.

Also it’s impossible to talk about this without also talking about we don’t socialize our boys. We tell girls to be quiet, sit still, diligent, careful but we do not teach our boys any of these things. In fact we allow/encourage the opposites. So when a boy has been socialized his whole life to love playing football and shouting at the top of his lungs, naturally, doing a task such as reading or writing is under their excitement level and seems tedious. Especially if they’ve never seen the older men around them take up a book in their entire lives.

The Stigmatization of Books

I saw a YouTube video about this once and it has not left my mind. In the education system reading, like everything else, becomes a task. There is no room for it to develop into a passion because the books we’re given are there for us to take information from and get an A. It’s a process we go through to get good end results. So, it's no surprise no one reads in their spare time. Why would they if they're not going to get their A? We train children to think of reading as a medial task you go through but we do not teach them that reading itself should be the gratification. But that's mostly for textbooks, let's talk about literature.

In literature classes schools do not allow for students to enjoy books just for fun, minus the storytimes that are far and few in between, at least for me. There still is the end-goal of getting an A but also there’s a syllabus and course outline. They teach us to identify tropes, synthesis and techniques. So, you read Shakespeare not to enjoy it but to learn about what the syllabus wants you to learn about. This is why many people’s passion for reading dissipate in schools (I’m holding on by a thread). Not to mention, many of the books they give us are hard to read and not reflective of the modern era. And to make matters worse, the books have little to no black characters. Living in the Caribbean I’m lucky to read books with black characters but many do not have that opportunity and that contributes to the alienation of black boys from books.

The Feminization Of The Arts

Now, this always confused me because women seemed more invested in the arts than men yet the most well-known creatives are...men. The patriarchy really be like that sometimes, huh? Anyway, reading and writing have almost become synonymous to femininity. Why?

Alright, let's look back at The Way We Socialize Our Black Boys, remember all that? Yes, all of that was training for our black men to understand what is masculine. Aggressive, extroverted and forceful can all be considered to be masculine behaviour. Writing doesn't fall under any of that. And since masculinity, especially among my black fellas is so fragile (guys, it’s true and you know it), once it's not masculine it's...you guessed it! Feminine. And nobody wants to be a sissy or gay. You just don't. So black boys stay away from it, while females who were taught so well to be quiet and thoughtful fit into it perfectly.

Black Boys Inability To Express and Confront Feelings

Drake really be the only thing helping black guys to talk about their feelings, wow. No, but black men, I think, are required to almost always be clear-minded and void of emotion. Of course now, things are changing but largely I think it’s still a persistent issue because as I mentioned before black families are still mostly traditional. I vividly remember a member of my writers club telling me he literally could not write because if he did he would be confronting feelings and he can’t afford that. See, that’s a problem. I mean this is why men lash out in various ways but particularly why writing seems like such a estranged task. To write something real means to confront a part of them they’ve been taught to suppress. Sounds problematic but these are the facts.

Conclusion

Whew, a little problematic but so was Karl Marx, right? Alright, so if you liked this post or thought it raised some good points drop a like! If you have opinions too don’t feel shy, comment and let your voice be heard.

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